The unexpected

So on Sunday I started what I thought was my period. I was feeling really exhausted and my typically PMS self for the past week so I thought for sure that when I started bleeding on Sunday that it was caused by that. It seemed like a normal period. However, on Monday I had two accidents where I was gushing. I thought for sure that it was just heavy because it was my first period after the baby. I had never had accidents like that before. Well it finally slowed down for the day and next day it was just normal again. Wednesday it started off so slow that I thought great that it was ending soon. Well it was snowing that morning so I should have realised that this may not be the typical day that I had had envisioned. It was the last day before I would have to return to work so I was being especially lazy that day.

All of the sudden about 2:00 pm I was right in the middle of feeding Sophia. I finished one side and I felt this HUGE gush. I was like shit. Not again. I am too freaking old to have these accidents. So I put babygirl in the bouncer and ran to the restroom. But this time it kept on coming. It was gushing and gushing. Filling the toilet to the top. I flushed. I tried to stand but I was bleeding down my legs. Not normal at all. I started to panic. I was standing in a pull of blood and conveniently I was out of toilet paper. So I put on a super thick pad and ran to get toilet paper. Well that pad filled up in 2 second flat. More panic sets in. This time I put on another pad super thick pad ran to get my cell phone and baby girl in her bouncer. She was screaming at this point.

Because the toilet was full and the floor was covered with blood.. I decided to position myself in the shower and put baby next to me on the floor. I was bleeding at the same rate and I could feel chunks going out. I was freaked out. I called Sandro and told him I am bleeding and it won't stop. He immediately left work and called 911. The issue though is that with the dogs being as protective as they are 911 could not get into the house. So Sandro had to get there first. I was in a panic. I felt the worse pain my uterus. I thought I was going to die and was worried he wasn't going to make it.

He gets there and they load me in the ambulance. At this point I could not even move I was so weak. They cover me with multiple blankets and I soaked right through those blankets. They where worried about taking me to far because at this point I lost so much blood and my blood pressure was really low. They took me to Baylor Carrolton and I was looked out immediately. I had two IV's inserted on both sides. The nurse was grossed out by all the blood that was still gushing out of me. She kept covering me. The doctor looked and immediately ordered a u/s and he consulting with the on staff obgyn and it appear that I had some retained tissue. So I had to get a D&C to stop the bleeding. Normally this procedure takes about 10 minutes. They have to put you completely out before they can begin. So they take me away to get the D&C and I was out in a matter of minutes. I woke up in ICU because I was in shock for about a hour after losing all the blood. Sandro was so worried because the doctor didn't get to come tell me that I was going to be okay. So he was looking everywhere for me. Finally they let him come back to see me in recovery. They get me vitals under control. I was getting a blood transfusion. The bleeding had stopped and it discovered that I had 5 CM of the placenta in my uterus that caused the bleeding. What is so strange is that normally this discovered immediately after birth. But my body as strange as it is decided to hold on to it (which it could have gotten infected) and not appear to week 7. I had already had my 6 week appointment and all was healthy. So this was such a unexpected surprise.

All I know is that I never never been as scared as I was that day. I felt so helpless and worried. Sophia stayed with Grandma Vesna. Vesna told me that she wouldn't sleep until 2:30 a.m. because she wanted mommy (or my boobies) I don't think I could have done much for her in the hospital as I was trying to recover from the blood lose. I was able to pump to keep my supply. It was funny that I learned just how much Sophia was able to get from me. I had pumped over 9 ounces. I tossed it because of all the drugs that where in my system. But I pumped every three hours and was able to produce a pretty decent amount. So it looks like my supply is slowly increasing.

I am just extremely thankful to be alive today and happy that I have health insurance to cover this crazy unexpected event. It makes you realise that life is way to short to and to appreciate all that you got. I now realise that the exhaustion I was feeing and the blood from that Monday where my signals that something was wrong. I just didn't get the clues.

Pics from this week. Well I only had a few. Vesna celebrated her 50th birthday yesterday. So most on from then.

Two grandpa's love their Sophia.

The snow from Wednesday. :)