Brief History of Me pt 1

Lately I have been thinking a lot about my past. What made me who I am today. I often try to move forward and not dwell on the past. But sometimes I am reminded or I feel guilty for how well my life has turned out.

When I was five my mom and dad got divorced. My mother was married to a military life so she has to readjust to starting her life on her own. She moved to Bastrop, Texas with two kids in tow. It was the 80's and there was a recession. My mother found a job working for the state. Barely making minimum wage but the health insurance was really great. (oh how times have changed)

Shortly after coming to live in Texas I was diagnosed with chronic depression and severe anger issues. I also had learning disabilities. (slightly dyslexic and lazy concentration) Usually I had a tough time controlling my emotions. Often I would cry in school. From the age of 6 and up. Not sure what caused it. I was bullied for this. Made fun for being different. Made fun of for my clothes, being larger, made fun for my outbursts. I went to counseling for all of my student life up to 11th grade. They told me that I had grown out of it. However, they never once thought I was good enough for college or that I could make it in the real world. I kinda feel I was given up on. I would like to say that this broke me. But it didn't. All it did was make me more determined to reach my dreams and not be poor my whole life.

I started working when I was 14 at a local online computer book store. This was the mid 90's. This is the first time I was introduced to computers. I fell instantly in love. The geek side of me was finally blossoming.

To be continued....

Some pics from this morning...Working on my girlie new years resolution. :)

Me No make-Up

Me with Make-up

Quick Adjustments

Since Sandro has returned to going to classes twice a week we had to make some mini changes.

A) We can't carpool on M&W anymore. Bummer for me. Especially on a rainy days like today. Where my little commuter car barely stays above water. It's very low to the ground. Lets just hope that Dallas doesn't flood today!

B) We have less time for chores. We have to be quick and prioritize more when it comes to this. Which isn't always easy with a 2 year old munchkin.

C) Waking up early on the days we don't commute together. I literally have to be out the door no later than 6:30...6:25 is better. The school zones on Josey are hella bad. Plus Sandro doesn't have a carpool lane so it takes him a while.

D) I MUST leave work at 4:40 on the days I have to pick up Sophia. If I leave at 4:41 it can mean 30-40 mins delays. Luckily I have the most understanding boss in the world and since I get to work at 7 AM. I don't feel all that guilty.

E) Cooking meals is a challenge. Luckily we have a crockpot and we often use it . Sandro does 95% of the cooking so he preps two meals for the nights he has class. This helps me out tremendously.

Some Positives:

I get some much needed one on one time with Sophia. Picking her up. Watching her favorite movies with her. Talking to her about her day. All with mommy. She is very clingy with me lately. I love this time I get to be with her.

Sandro is following his dream. He wants his masters and maybe one day his Doctores. He says it will take him 5 years. I can't blame him for having a dream. I have my dreams to. So I will support him the best way I know how.

Some crockpot love...

Super easy, super healthy and Super Yummy. Who doesn't love their Crockpot?

Some didn't notice this video of Sophia singing in the car. She LOVES to sing. She loves this song and locomotion.

Master Camera Avoider

Lately Sophia has been hiding from the camera. As soon as I take it out she runs from me. Drives me bonkers. This can be very hard on person who loves photography. I hope it's just a phase.

Update on Potty training is that it's a slow process. I hear all the time how some kids pick it up right away. Not Sophia. She has some really good days and some really bad days. She is extremely smart so I am thinking she just doesn't want to potty train some days and pretty much goes on break. Then the next day she wants to potty in the toilet again. What is worse is that she HATES to go poop in the toilet. She just refuses. Sigh.

I have read the 3 day Manuel and I all I could see is all the stuff I am apparently doing wrong. But it's sorta difficult to start a new method since she is doing somewhat okay with what she is doing right now.

So here is some avoiding pictures from Missy this week. The only time I can get her to look at the camera is when we are in the car. Otherwise. It's a no go.

Sophia's First B-Day Invite

Sophia was invited to Skyler and Jacey (4 year) birthday party. It was at Chuck E Cheese. Sophia has never been. So all she wanted to do was touch things. Everything she saw she wanted to feel it. I was running around chasing her everywhere. She was one of the youngest ones there so I couldn't just let her run free in a place like that.

She was so happy. They would have some music playing and the robot Chuck E would be "performing" and Sophia, being as cute as she always is, would just be dancing. All by her self getting down. She just loved to disco dance. I think she may have scared Skyler and Jacey at first because she just would dance and dance. She loved it. She gave them the biggest hug before she left the party.

Later she told me all about her fun time at the birthday party. The pizza, Spongebob Square Pants Cake and of course the dancing. She couldn't have been more happy with the experience.

Adventures in Potty Training

Lets just begin this with I really wasn't ready to start yet. Sophia is only 2 years in a few months. I thought I had a few months. Reasons I think she may not be ready is because she just doesn't seem interested in going potty or getting out of diapers. Also, most mornings she wakes with a wet diaper. I have been told usually you want to start potty training about when they have consistent dry diapers in the AM. She hasn't done this in a while.

However, god love her, my MIL went out and bought her princess panties. At Daycare Sophia was talking to her friend Sophie and she showed Sophia her princess panties. Sophie explained to Sophia that big girls get to wear Princess Panties. Sophia was now intrigued and wanted to start. Hence the reason my MIL bought the panties.

So I began on Sunday morning. She picked her panties out and she was so excited to give it a try. I was getting ready and I had planned to die my hair that morning. I told her Tata to please ask her if she needs to go potty all the time. Which I could hear her ask her multiple times. 1st accident occurs not even 15 mins in. I was like no big deal. It wasn't that bad. But then not even 30 mins later she did it again, this time a big amount of pee pee. I was fumming mad now. I mean I was just trying to get ready for the day. I told her that if she has three accidents we would try again next weekend. So this is when I started setting the timer. Every 20-30 mins I would take Sophia to the potty and have her go. Even if she didn't need to. She needed to learn to go in the potty.

This was successful. Even through nap time she didn't pee in the diaper. So I gave her a victory ice cream. We had to run errands so I decided to put on a pull up. Because I didn't want to risk having a accident in transit. We finished our errands. So I put her back into her princess panties. Most of the afternoon went exceptionally well. Then that last hour came. We still going to the potty every thirty minutes. I had just set the time for what I thought would be the last time for that evening.

Not even 15 minutes later I hear her daddy yell she pooped her pants. I was like really? Come on we just went to the potty 15 mins ago. It was a blow out. It was everywhere. Lets just say it just made me want to give up. I asked Sophia what happened. She just gave me a blank look. Like I was the crazy one.

I really don't think she is ready yet but we will keep trying. My coworker gave me the 3 day potty training boot camp guide. I hope this helps.

Below is Sophia munching down on some of daddy's feta special grits. Uber yummy!


Enjoying her Victory Ice Cream

Little Miss Bossy

Lately Sophia has been extremely moody when it comes to getting up in the morning and going to daycare. Some days are better than others. She is okay with the whole getting ready part as soon as we get into the car she tells us that we can't take her to daycare. Or Daycare is no good. (her words) Part of me wants to laugh at this but I am not sure if I really should. As maybe this could be making matters worse and she thinks I am joking with her. I am sure it's just a phase. She had almost two weeks off during the Christmas break. Perhaps she will start liking daycare again. When she arrives at daycare she refuses to eat. She will just say no! no! and walks away or attempts to follow us out. Luckily her Baka is there and Sophia instantly starts to warm up to the idea of being there. I am told when I see her in the evening that she has a awesome great day and her moody stops when we leave.

She is very direct with her demands lately. Like during bath time she says "Mama SIT DOWN!" over and over until I do. I ask her to say please and she does. But hesitantly.

Or the other day when we going to the park she told me and Tata to stay and that we where in timeout. And not to follow her. Slowly we would creep behind her and she would come back and tell us again to stay..we are in timeout. I had to laugh at this one. She gets this look of determination like I am going to do what I want to do.

I hope I am not encouraging this behavior. I try to tell her to be nice to her Mama and Tata. To use please and thank you. But I have a feeling she got this from me. I was a bossy pants as well, so I am was told. I am pretty bossy now. I am sure she sees this and just mimicking me.

On to other things. I didn't mention the one of my personal goals I have for myself for 2012.

To embrace my girlie side. I seem to always want to say that I am a tomboy. But the reality is that I do enjoy girlie things. I like make-up, I like dressing up and I like to fix my hair. I think part of the reason that I say I am not into "being girlie" is because I don't like that I am overweight. I usually wear baggy clothes because I feel huge. I think I need to get over this. I am not huge. It's in my head. But for someone who has been overweight her entire life it's sometimes hard to look past what you once where. I want Sophia never to feel this way about herself. I want to be a good example for her.

I leave you with a cute video of Sophia showing her bossy side. Also a lovely before picture of me. Sorry for the low quality in advance. The lighting in the bathroom sucks!

New Year = Fresh Start

Well I disappeared for awhile but I thought that it may be time for me to return. I have a ton of new goals for the new year. So why not make myself more accountable and write them out.

Last year was terrific. Sophia is growing so quickly and time seems to be ticking away. Sandro and I also celebrated our 5 year anniversary. Five years of a lovely marriage. Two years which included our whole heart Miss Sophia Genelle Juric. The dogs are also doing great. Our life is generally happy. We went to Kauai for our 5 year anniversary. This is when Sandro and I discovered that we have some big goals which may include living in Kauai after Sophia (and possible future kids) are done with school. Maybe it is wishful thinking but there is something about that island we just love. All we know is that we definitively want to retire somewhere like this or just relocate.

We have a lot of goals to accomplish that require us to stay focused. This next year will be more of a development year to help us get to the point where we can grow and flourish even more years beyond now.

First things for first here is the list of personal resolutions:

1) Write in my blog at the minimal of 2 times a week - Over the last year I got lazy. Distracted with stupid stuff. I can take 30 mins out of my day twice a week. Even if it's just tell a funny Sophia story or vent about life in general.

2) Lose 15 pounds and maintain my already 50 pound weight loss. I would like to be at 165 before TTC another baby. Currently I am about 185 ish. Not terrible. Within a healthy weight range for my height but I really could do better if I just stay focused and stop eating "the junk" and continuing on with my exercise routine.

3) Sandro returns to school to begin working on this masters. He already enrolled in community college so that he can obtain more math credits so he can apply for admissions to start his masters.

4) To both get raises this year. No explanation needed on this. But it will be a requirement so we can do #5 of resolution on a more timely basis.

5) Pay off truck and start saving for baby #2. This is a big one for me. The only thing holding us back from having #2 at this point is all financial. My goal is to dump all extra money towards this truck. Current truck payment is $356 a month. Plan to put $400 a additional per month. $756 is what daycare will cost us for a second child not including Sophia. Total daycare is $1450 a month. Holy crap that is a lot. Plan to have this paid off in 15 months. (750*15 = $11,250)

6) If we stay on plan that means we will TTC #2 by October 2012. Or at least begin. Hopefully get PG before February 2013.

7) To keep myself motivated I just have to be more positive. I have learned that I am all about routine and either I need to embrace this about myself or learn to get the F over it. Being positive is essential to reaching our goals 15 years from now.

8) Run a 5k competitively. I have been running now for about 6 months. I need to find a few races and actually run one for real.

To end today I leave you with a few words from Miss Sophia.